


The Poetry of You

by Ravens_World



Series: we are all just stars, that have people names [2]
Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Happy Ending, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2020-05-29
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:54:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24443194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ravens_World/pseuds/Ravens_World
Summary: Once he was at the doorway, he allowed himself to look back at the man he loved, memorizing the way he looked in his bed, and then he looked away-He's not yours.-and he reminded himself to breathe...............
Relationships: Michael Guerin/Alex Manes
Series: we are all just stars, that have people names [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2062095
Comments: 7
Kudos: 100





	The Poetry of You

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this yesterday in like two hours, so I hope you enjoy! I decided to write it as a sequel to Bound by Stardust, but you don't have to read that to know what's going on here!

Alex woke up to insistent ringing of his door bell alternating with hurried knocks on his door. He looked to the side and cursed when he saw it was only 1 am. He scrambled out of bed, and with no time to wear his prosthetic, he used his crutches. His heart in his throat, Alex could do nothing to stop himself from imagining one bad scenario after another in the few seconds it took to reach the front door. 

He unlocked his phone to check the footage of his security cameras and stopped dead in his tracks a few feet away from the door when he saw who it was. 

Michael, leaning against the door, eyes closed and arms crossed against his chest. Alex hurried to the door, let go of one crutch and leaned against the wall to open it. Michael crashed through, since Alex hadn't warned him before opening the door, and ended up sprawled on the floor. Alex resisted the urge to laugh and moved so that he was standing over him, looking down at him and unable to keep from smiling. Michael smiled back, that goofy, unguarded, genuine smile of his, and Alex was helpless against the affection that rose within him at the sight. He carefully used the wall for support as he lowered himself to sit by Michael's head. 

"Hey," Michael said, dopey smile still in place as he nuzzled Alex's leg. 

Alex laughed and gently lifted Michael's head into his lap and began to comb his fingers through the other man's curls. Michael hummed in pleasure, and Alex did his best to ignore the sudden surge of desire the sound alighted in him. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to Michael's hair and ignored the guilt it caused when he remembered that Michael was with Maria, that Alex wasn't allowed to do this anymore. He was, for once, reckless with his affection, mostly because he was sure Michael wouldn't remember any of it tomorrow with how drunk he was. 

Michael's hand flopped in his direction a few times, to Alex's amusement, before it landed on his waist in an awkward imitation of a hug. Alex rubbed his arm. "Michael? You wanna move any time soon?" 

He shook his head, scooted his head closer and closer until Alex could feel his breath fanning against his bare stomach, dangerously close. Alex grit his teeth and told himself not to want him, and it took a herculean effort to stop himself from leaning into Michael until he had his lips where he really wanted them. 

Alex knew he needed to put distance between them, but it seemed like the more he tried, the more he wanted him. It was counterproductive in the worst way possible. 

Alex laughed helplessly. "What are you doing to me, huh?"

Michael just humphed and that was when Alex realized that he was asleep. 

Alex wondered if this was his punishment for telling him he loved him and running away before Michael could get a word out. 

  
He honestly hadn't blamed him for needing a minute to digest the reveal of Alex's worst kept secret. Hell, Alex himself had been shocked he'd had the guts to actually say the words. But hearing the uncertainty in Michael's voice, the resignation in the way he'd asked him if he still loved him, had shaken Alex, had hurt in the worst way possible, and his need to reassure Michael that he had, and always would love him won over his instincts that screamed at him to run and protect himself. 

Alex closed his eyes and pictured a world where he had been braver, a world where he had allowed his love for Michael outweigh his fear of his father, a world where he had held onto Michael and showed him how much he had loved him every minute of every day. Tears welled in his eyes and he used the heels of his hands to dig into his eyes until he saw stars and then he put all those thoughts away in a little box and focused on the man sleeping on him.

His hand moved to Michael's face on its own violation and he traced the wrinkle between his brows and marveled at the immediate relaxation his touch caused. The tips of his fingers made their way down to his nose and then onto his cheek and down until he reached his lips. He wanted to bend down and let his lips travel the same route his fingers had taken, but he wasn't sure he had the strength to have his lips be so close to Michael's and not be tempted to kiss him. 

Alex forced himself to lean back on the wall and took deep breaths, counting back from 100 mindlessly to give his body a chance to catch up with his brain. 

Loathe as he was to do it, Alex knew he needed to wake Michael up. He gently shook his shoulder, carded his hand through his hair, called his name softly. None of it worked. 

He rolled his eyes. "Michael, " he called his name loudly, then shook him not so gently, but he seemed genuinely dead to the world. 

Alex went from fond to annoyed real quick and he considered going to bed and leaving him to sleep on the floor for all of two seconds before he dismissed the thought. He tried to wake him up again, and when it didn't work again, he resigned himself to the fact that he would resort to the tried and true method he'd used to wake Kyle up when they'd been kids. 

"What the hell?!" Michael shot up, flailing and when he settled, he rubbed his ear with a disgusted look on his face. 

Alex snickered and only laughed harder when Michael glared at him while rubbing at his ear. "Real mature."

Alex flushed, but he was still grinning, and he felt light for some reason. Sure, he'd just stuck a wet finger in Michael's ear like a little kid, but he could see Michael trying to keep up the annoyed facade, and then they were both laughing loudly and Alex felt _alive_.

Once their laughter died down, their eyes locked and though Michael looked two seconds away from laying back down on the floor to sleep, he was looking at him with dark eyes full of want, eyes that kept straying to his lips, and it was overwhelming. 

"Help me up?" 

Michael tried to stand gracefully but failed and ended up using the wall for support. 

Once he was standing on his own, semi-stable, he extended a hand out to Alex. "If you drop me, you're sleeping on the couch."

Michael raised an eyebrow, then hauled him up easily. Alex narrowed his eyes. "You used your powers, didn't you?"

Michael just smirked. He handed him his crutches and they made their way to Alex's bedroom. Alex had a guest room Michael could sleep in, and Michael knew it, but it was a fact they both chose to ignore as they slipped carefully into his bed. They gravitated towards each other, but kept a respectable distance of all of two inches between them. It was a miracle, Alex thought wryly, that they'd even manged that.

"Michael?"

He didn't open his eyes. "Hmm?" 

"Why'd you come here?"

His eyes opened, and Alex could see him freeze. 

"You want me to go?"

"No!" He rushed to reassure him. "God, no, that's not- I just meant, why come to me?" 

"Because you told me you loved me, and everything else didn't matter anymore."

He sounded a lot more sober than he had been a few minutes ago, but Alex still though they shouldn't be having this conversation right now. 

"Okay," Michael agreed easily when he told him to stop talking. At his incredulous look, he shrugged. "What I want to say to you won't change, so if it'll make you feel better, I'll just tell you tomorrow." 

Alex swallowed, hard, and twisted in the bed to turn off the light. Once the room was bathed in darkness, Michael took his hand in his and interlocked their fingers, and Alex's breath left him in a rush. He hadn't held Michael's hand in so long that this touch alone nearly undid him.

"Goodnight, Michael."

"Night, Alex."

............... 

When Alex woke up, the only feeling he could register was warmth, the type of unnatural warmth he'd come to associate with Michael, and he genuinely thought he was dreaming for the few seconds it took for him to actually wake up. Then his eyes shot open and he looked down to see Michael clinging to him, half of his body on top of his, and Alex felt overwhelmed in the best way. 

He slowly disentangled himself from Michael and watched him frown and turn his head a little to the side, as if unconsciously looking for Alex. 

And Alex couldn't take it. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Then he wore his prosthetic. And all the while, he reminded himsel, viciously, that Michael was with Maria, that he'd chosen her, that he couldn't hurt Maria the way she'd hurt him. 

Once he was at the doorway, he allowed himself to look back at the man he loved, memorizing the way he looked in his bed, and then he looked away-

_He's not yours._

-and he reminded himself to breathe.

* * *

Michael woke up just as Alex plated the last pancake and he wondered if he timed that or if it was just a coincidence. 

"Coffee?"

Michael just nodded and shuffled his feet. "Listen, Alex, about last night-"

Alex's heart sank and he nodded. "Already forgotten. Don't worry about it."

When he looked at him, Michael's expression screamed 'pissed off' and Alex frowned. "What?"

"What do you mean what?"

Michael shook his head. "God, you piss me off."

Alex felt his hackles rising. "Excuse me?"

"I wasn't that drunk last night, Alex."

Alex crossed his arms tightly and leaned against the counter. "You seemed pretty drunk to me."

"I drank maybe two beers yesterday. What you saw? That was me being bone tired because I haven't been able to get what you said out of my head for the past two days and it's been driving me insane."

Alex stared, and when hope reared its ugly head, he brutally pushed it down. 

"You told me that you love me, Alex. You _love me_. And I- do you have any idea how long I've been wanting to hear you say that?"

"I do," he answered honestly. "I've been waiting just as long."

Michael took a step back and Alex could see the gears turning in his head, trying to recall if he really hadn't ever said the words to him. Alex wanted to scoff; as if he'd ever forget Michael telling him that he loved him.

His eyes stung and he turned to he sink, busying himself with cleaning the pan. The silence was deafening, but he didn't know how to break it. When Alex sensed Michael was close, so close he could feel the heat emitting from him, he unconsciously swayed closer before he caught himself doing it and pushed himself closer to the sink, hands braced and knuckles white. 

Michael tenderly unfurled his hands and then used his grip to spin him around so that he was facing him.

"I never realized that I didn't say it. It's just- loving you is so ingrained into every part of me that I just thought it was obvious, you know?"

Alex nodded and looked down at their hands. "I was okay with not hearing it, because I thought I didn't need to. I knew how you felt about me, but lately- lately, it felt like it was just something I made up because I needed to feel like _someone_ loved me. And that hurt."

There were tears in both their eyes now, and Alex needed space. He needed to not be where Michael was.

"I love you."

Alex's thoughts, his world, screeched to a halt and he gaped at him.

"I love you, Alex Manes." He crowded him against the sink and he rested his forehead against his. His hands came up to stroke his neck and Alex shivered, moving closer on instinct. 

"Loving you is a part of who I am now, Alex. And most days, it's the only part I'm sure of, the only part I'm proud of. I've been an ass, and the way I handled things was-" he shook his head, "Being with Maria was easy because I knew I cared about her, but I would never love her like I love you, and that would mean loving her wouldn't hurt. So, in my head, it made sense to try with her."

Alex moved away from him and swallowed thickly.

"Alex?"

"You can't do this to me. You'r with Maria, so please- just don't- I need you to stop."

"So you get to say it, but I don't?"

"Yes!" Alex hissed through gritted teeth. "Yes, I get to, because I'm not currently with someone, Michael. I'm unattached! So I get to tell you I love you, but you sure as hell don't!"

"Fuck you," Michael told him slowly, without heat. "You think I'm saying all of this to you while I'm still with Maria?"

Alex felt the air leave his lungs and he struggled to find his footing. "What?" He asked faintly.

"I talked to Maria. We're done. I'm unattached, too, darlin'."

Alex searched his face. "Are you sure-"

Michael effectively shut him up with a hard kiss. And good god, it felt like coming home. 

"I love you. I've loved you for over ten years now, and I'll never stop loving you. I don't ever want to."

Alex ignored the tears streaming down his face in favor of pulling Michael into his arms. He kissed him softly, once, twice and then migrated up and he kissed every inch of his face, tasting his salty tears and reveling in the fact that for once, they were tears of joy, of relief, of hope, for the both of them.

Michael leaned down and buried his head in Alex's neck, breathing in deeply. Alex buried his fingers in his hair, and he tightened his grip unconsciously when Michael's lips brushed against the hollow of his throat, and moved higher, pressing kisses along his neck. He used his grip on his hair to pull his head back and he took a second to take him in. His hair was messy from Alex's fingers, his pupils were blown wide and he was breathing heavily. 

Michael's fingers snuck under his shirt and they moved up. It killed Alex to stop him, but he knew he had to. "We are not having sex, Michael."

Michael pulled away and eyed him closely. "And why is that?"

"Because I want to do this right, this time."

Michael looked confused. "Do what right?"

Alex rolled his eyes heavenward and looped his arms around Michael's neck. "Us."

"Why does doing this right include no sex?" He whined. 

"Because, Michael," he explained patiently, "we tend to not talk. And we can't do that anymore."

Michael kissed him again, hungry and intense, and Alex almost said fuck it and pulled him into the bedroom, but then the kiss slowed and it became something soft and gentle, almost like Michael had changed his mind mid kiss, and it gave Alex hope that they could build something real, on a solid foundation that wouldn't crumble at the slightest pressure. Michael pulled away, but didn't go far. He kissed the side of his head and Alex felt him smile against his skin.

They stayed wrapped up in each other for a minute, basking in the warmth and saftey of this embrace. 

"What are you doing tonight?" Alex asked, the words a mumble into the other man's neck.

Michael heard him all the same and he raised an eyebrow. "I have a feeling I'm about to find out."

"We're going on a date."

Michael stared at him, blinked, and then stared again. "A date?"

"Yes, a date."

Michael suddenly laughed and Alex narrowed his eyes at him. "What?"

"Nothing, it's just- I just realized; we've been in love with each other for over 10 years and we're going on our _first_ date _tonight_."

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoy, and Thank you for reading


End file.
